Why forgiveness is your biggest superpower
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In times of stress, life brings out the best and the worst in us. These times test our strength of character and highlight our values / morals. Certain events go down in history, as will surviving COVID-19. How do you want to be remembered in the history books?
All of this time being spent in lockdown and self-isolation is providing us with a bit of headspace to get to grips with our true values. In these unprecedented times, it's allowing the world to reset, consider what's important and decide what our personal legacy will be.
A legacy is something that is passed down from one generation to another. This could be financial or in the morals by which you lived. For some people, their legacy will be so profound that the world will be altered in some way, such as: Emmeline Pankhurst, Marie Curie, Princess Diana, J. K. Rowling or Oprah. Everyone, at some point in their life, will have an impact on someone elses. Maya Angelou (an American poet, singer, memoirist, and civil rights activist) once said “I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel”. What will your legacy be during this testing time?
Here are some important questions you can ask yourself to figure this out:
1. Do I give or take?
When times get tough, are you someone that helps other people or puts yourself first? Times of stress can cause people to jump into survival mode and look for comfort and safety. This is what happened with the toilet roll shortage of 2020! It created a herd-effect of panic and self-preservation. However it's people's generosity, community spirit and small acts of kindness which create a movement and inspire a nation. Like all of those people who have; donated towards the NHS, taken part in 'clap for your keyworkers' or the shopkeepers who have helped the elderly. It bought out a sense of community and togetherness which will forever be remembered. If everyone tried to do one good deed a day, the world world look very different. The behaviour that you chose will give you a reputation which will stay with you for years to come, even after the stressful time has passed. Choose your actions wisely.
2. Do I respond with fight or flight?
The fight or flight response is first and foremost for our survival. It protects us from danger and threat by getting us ready, physiologically and mentally, to fight or run away. Our bodies interpret change as a threat, therefore triggering this physiological response. Being in a prolonged period of stress can result in similar behaviours. This can make us tired and more irritable. Every person has a different tolerance and while some people will become defensive and angry, it will spur others to be measured and proactive. You can choose to control your stress response and not let it control you. Next time you’re in a testing situation, make note of how you react and maybe pause for 5 seconds before responding.
3. Am I optimistic or pessimistic?
Lockdown has highlighted the true value of all aspects of our lives. Designer labels have no worth, relationships have a higher importance and are no longer being taken for granted, and we've realised what a luxury holidays are. It's funny how you see this once you no longer have those choices available.
The importance of being happy within yourself and not relying on external sources has never been more prominent. Lockdown is miserable when you sit with your demons. Social distancing highlights the fact that we crave social interaction, and sometimes, social media just isn't enough. We'll never again miss the chance to give our families a hug or tell them that we love them. Your mindest will have everything to do with this. Are you choosing to look for the positives or are the negatives overwhelming? Start by listing 5 things that you’re grateful for.
4. Am I using my time or abusing it?
Use this self-isolation time as a period for growth and introspection. Learn a new skill or develop a current one. Not using this time that we are being given is like throwing your lottery winnings out of a plane. You will never get this amount of quality time back, take advantage of it.
This is a time to treat our bodies well: get into an exercise routine, eat fresh food and be mindful to schedule rest days amongst the week as this is a key part of your wellbeing. I’ve compiled a whole list of things, from books to yoga equipment, that can help you to invest in yourself during this time. Use this time for self-discovery and getting clear on your life goals and personal mission. I’ve created a mini course which can help you on your way - click here to check it out.
5. What are your values?
With the world taking away our options, it's really narrowed down our view of what's important. It's highlighted the jobs that are required to make the world go round and function on a basic level. It's put emphasis on relationships; both with others and yourself, finding the beauty around you and living in the moment. When you're unable to plan for the future it forces you to remain in the present.
I firmly believe that things happen for a reason and that we can choose the way in which we react. Maybe we needed to be shaken up and our values realigned. The world is resetting itself. Nature is rebounding. Pollution is reducing and never again will we take the closeness of a loved one for granted. It's easy to lose perspective when we caught up in the rat race and often vanity becomes a driving factor. Maybe the instagram likes, football final or holiday abroad aren't essential?
So, how do you want to be remembered?
You can choose the legacy that you leave in your footsteps and carve a path that others can follow. Be a leader and lead by example. All it takes is for one person to show the way and others will follow.
Thank you for reading!
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